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M2 Edge Oxford Brookes to Stay in the Hunt


24th November 2019

By Mark Haycroft

Men's 2s 2 - 1 Oxford Brookes Men's 1s

A delightful day once again in leafy Surrey saw Surbiton Men’s 2s take on the high flying Oxford Brooke’s Men’s 1s who were sitting at the top of the South Premier Division 2 West league. 

The mouth-watering contest presented what should be a game of the highest possible quality hockey to take place at 1pm at Sugden Road on the water.

The cacophony of noise reverberated around the amphitheatre of SHC, only moments before the whistle signified the start of the impending battle. The 2s looked to continue the momentum created by a dominant 5-0 win away at relatively local rivals, Richmond. A team which included a few ‘not-so-good-lads’ from the University of Birmingham class of ’09.

Some senior members of the team had wanted to change the focus of the team to a more game-by-game fashion, rather than wanting to simply gain the necessary promotion. So far so good. A tactic which everyone has admirably bought into, providing some sensational performances and results. The quality of hockey usually witnessed from the Hoofdklasse fixtures, only a short hop across the (soon to be departed) continent, in the Netherlands.

Full of confidence all over the pitch, the younger members of the team, AKA ‘the kids’ have dominated against their usually more decrepit opponents. The more senior members, meanwhile, have tried to lead by example. Scotteeeeeeeeeeee ‘The Aggressor’ Haycroft, Rhys ‘The Enforcer’ Linnnnnnnnelllllllllll, Tom ‘The Oil Tanker’ Beaumont, Dave ‘The Silver Bean’ Bartram, to name but a few, have all contributed some of the most consistent performances so far. No mean feat given their considerable age advantage over their pre-pubescent teammates.

Despite a rather subdued pre-match team talk delivered by the ever eloquent, ‘neanderthalic’ looking Redfoo from the popular pop group LMFAO, and the assumed hung-over, lethargic nature of Joshua ‘Bloodshot’ Redstone and Max ‘Cool, I can drink now’ Anderson, (who passed the ball off the back line with his first touch), Surbiton started quite well, playing themselves into the game. The SHC defence was more difficult to infiltrate than a Year 7 school disco dance floor, also ignoring the continuous, confused conversations between Nik ‘Efficient’ Habbel and Ben ‘Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy’ Tinker about this week’s mathematics homework.

Alliteration aside, someone put SHC 1-0 before half time despite several chances gong amiss. After half time, someone from Oxford made it 1-1 but a different person from Surbiton made it 2-1 and the 2s won, funnily enough, 2-1.

David Walliams and his Irish colleague dealt with the aggressive and frantic nature of the game relatively well, many thanks to them.

A big, potential six points in the title race. Well done to the team. On to the next skirmish against Henley, away next week, pack the blazers and boaters chaps. Keep up the momentum.

POM – Rhys ‘Twice The Health – I love running’ Tyldesley

DOD – Mark ‘Well overdue – still 1-shot-1-goal’ Haycroft